6 Ways To Overcome Shyness And Gain Confidence
Posted: Saturday, April 01, 2006
by John Edmond
Are you shy? Do you have difficulty coping with people or situations? Then I have good news for you. You do not have to suffer from shyness and you should not feel insecure and fear that you are being judged with every step you take.
Winning the war with shyness takes practice, but is definitely well worth the effort as the result is increasing confidence and self esteem. Wake up feeling good about yourself, able to face the world with confidence and security and the knowing that no feeling of shyness can come in your way of achieving your desires.
1. Every morning, as soon as you get up, get in front of a mirror and say out loud "I feel terrific! I feel terrific! I feel terrific!" Repeat this affirmation with enthusiasm at least ten times everyday until it's ingrained into your subconscious mind. If feel a little self conscious to begin with lock yourself in the bathroom. The results will amaze you.
2. Feel good about yourself. Look your best. Dress up more often. This gives you an extra feeling of confidence and self esteem. On its own just knowing that you look good will boost your confidence and reinforce with others that there are things about you that are worth getting to know.
3. Take a risk at least once a day. It's very invigorating and conquering fears by taking risks helps you grow in confidence and self esteem. Start with small risks and fears and as you overcome them move onto bigger things. There's nothing you cannot do. Be confident in knowing that change can only help you grow, and boost your self confidence.
4. When you are engaged in a one to one conversation, or with a larger group of people, let them know that you're shy. This prevents them from misreading you and they are far more likely to invite you into the conversation rather than leave you just listening and wishing you could contribute.
Many people, me included, find following a conversation in a noisy room difficult. If you are having difficulty say so and move so that you can hear. People respect honesty, and vulnerability and you will attract more honest people into your life as a result.
5. Rejection is a fact of life that everyone experiences. It is rarely you that is being rejected. If you are rejected, for example if you ask someone for a date, remember that everyone has different likes and dislikes. You may be attracted to one type of person and not others. The same applies to other people and you are probably just not their type. That does not devalue you in any way. Accept this and know that you will get over it. Never take it personally and keep in mind that if people reject you it is because of their own likes and dislikes and not because of who you are. You are equally entitled to reject others because of your likes and dislikes.
6. Engage in an activities that make you feel excited and good about yourself or start a hobby that gives you a feeling of relaxation. This could be anything from gardening to Tai Chi to Karate. Take some lessons, learn or master a musical instrument or take singing lessons. Do something that excites you and take a risk. Exploring things that make you feel excited is a great antidote for shyness.
About the Author
John Edmond recently obtained a degree in creative writing and now writes on a number of topics including self help, personal growth and self esteem. Go to http://www.buildingselfesteem.info for more information
This Article has been viewed 73,887 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
More commentsIm so shy... I mean ive been told tht i look cute and tht im a great person but i cant help but be quiet, shy and so softspoken. I really like this girl and i feel like i cant do anthing to get with her, im just tired of being the quiet one in my group of friends. I hope this helps, im tired of being single so i need some confidence to go up to a girl and im gonna have faith tht this will work. Thanks for the suggestions.
Ofcourse it did boost my confidence.I will surely apply these techniques in my life.Thanks for the effort.
I feel terrific I feel terrific I feel terrific! :)
YA, I felt it was good and hope that it would help me out
yes, it helps me a lot,,to overcome shyness.
Seriously? For one - Dress up more often. Most people will be waaay too self concious to do that, I mean honestly. And saying the terriffic thing? -.- Too scared to do that incase some one hears. And the singing / musical instrument idea?? Omg. This is for shy people, if you're as bad as I am there's no way you're going to take singing lessons and sing infront of people. I can barely speak in front of others, never mind sing... /: Great advice and all... But yeah. Xx
this is very inspirational....i alwayz struggle with self confidence...but this blog has rily helped me
i love to sing..i do lessons and everything and i play guitar but im too self concious to perform infront of anyone :/ my singing teacher reccomended i do a drama course but im wwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy to shy :( it really bothers me that i get so nervous over things like this cause id love to be able to do something with my singing :(
this article has a lot.i have so much of fear to atttend the interviews but now i wil try to follow your steps
I am no longer shy. Years ago I was. I practiced numbers 2 through 5 above long before this article was written and found that my confidence grew to the point that I was asking girls for dates no matter where I was. To name a few places as I recall, super markets, laundry mats, church, college classes, on the street, in the park, and a host of other places. I even remember being out to dinner with mom and dad one night and seeing an attractive salad bar hostess. As we were leaving the restaurant and getting to the car, I said to mom and dad that I had to go back and use the restroom. Of course I went back to get a number from this lady. We dated for 6 months. It is true the more you do something you are uncomfortable doing the easier it becomes. To all who read this, don't give up and just begin to do it.
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